Chapter 1: Please, stop!

Clara

The night had already set so deep, yet here I am staring right into my awful reflection through the mirror I badly wanted to crush in frustration. The same reason that made another night for me so gloomy.

Tracing down the horrible scar on my left cheek that made my life a living hell, I failed to notice tears strolling down my eyes.

If only I didn’t have this scar. If only I had the means to make it disappear, just like what I’ve thought, then maybe I would have a chance to stand against Alice. But being wolfless only means being the weakest among the weak.

My shoulder jolted in shock as the door of my room wildly pushed open, creating a loud banging noise. I left the mirror to see what it was, but I froze on the spot when I saw Samuel standing right after the door.

Seeing him with his tousled hair and dressed in crumpled clothes, I frowned. Regardless of his hollow cheeks, thick brows, and his chiseled jawline that made his features sculpted with perfection, the Samuel in front of me right now looked awry and miserable.

His sharp gaze roamed every corner of my room as if he was searching for me. It didn’t take him a while before his hooded sleepy eyes darted on me.

“Samuel?” I utter in disbelief seeing him inside my room.

A groan was the only thing I heard as a response as he started marching. His unstraight and unstable walking pace along with the overpowering scent of alcohol filling my nostrils made me realize he was drunk.

I didn’t wait for him to reach me and immediately hung his arm onto my shoulder to help him.

“Are you okay?”

“No, I’m not. You, whore!”

After making him sit on the edge of the mattress, and without minding his words, I turned around. “I’m gonna get you some water—”

However, I was interrupted when I felt a sudden bang of pain on my scalp because of his tightened grip on my hair which was on my waist length. Before I could protest, he forcibly pulled it, making me face him.

Watching his eyes blaze with rage, my heart pounded.

Samuel didn’t waste any more time and crushed my lips with his. My eyes balled out in surprise but were later replaced by an ache as there was no gentleness present with his every move.

His hands went down to my waist, gripping it, before shoving me to the mattress. Because of his undeniable strength as an Alpha, it took me longer to recover from the pain.

“What are you doing?”

Seeing him start to unbuckle his belt to pull his pants down, fear began to consume me.

Did he mistook me for Alice?

“Stop acting innocent. You want this to happen, right?” he bitterly chuckled, crawling his way on top of me.

His jaw was tightly clenching as he looked down on me. “You could have told me that you badly wanted me to fuck you, but you chose to drug me to risen my sex drive, huh. What do you think of me, stupid?!”

“No, I had no idea what drug you’re talking about. I didn’t do anything, Samuel,” my voice was pleading.

“That’s what you’re good at. Acting like an innocent angel, but deep inside you are just as evil as your father!”

I forced myself to sit down, pushing him by his chest. “Please, believe me.”

With just one tiny push from him, I fell back to the mattress. Samuel took that chance to hold both sides of my dress and tore it apart effortlessly.

I gulped, feeling my throat running dry. My hands were shaking as I pleaded for him not to do it. But as if he was suddenly deaf, he didn’t mind any of it.

His right hand was clutching both my tiny wrists as I tried to resist, while his left hand had already pulled the remaining cloth I had.

“No! Let me go!” My movements became rapid with my heart racing. However, with just one last move, my face crumpled with pain as Samuel successfully inserted his shaft.

“A-ah,” one painful scream escaped my mouth before I heavily shut my eyes with agony. It was as if my body was being torn apart with throbbing pain filling my entire body.

“I didn’t even think that you could still be a virgin,” he mockingly pants in between his thrusts.

The only thing I could hold on to was his arm that was covering my mouth. My nails dug into his skin with pain, while he slowly placed his palm up to my face, to cover it. He didn’t even mind if it would bring me pain just so he could be satisfied.

“Can’t even stand looking at your nasty scar,” he was catching his breath as he enjoyed himself while I squirmed in discomfort.

With every hard thrust he took from me, all I could think of was how my hatred toward my mate was growing.

I knew accepting a mate of someone like me wasn’t something he could do. But he’s gone too far.

His pace quickened before he groaned heavily. I felt him withdraw his thing, releasing all of his semen onto my thigh.

“It’s better to be safe because I would never want to impregnate you at all. My child would be so unfortunate to have a weak and hideous mother like you.”

I watched him fix himself, before turning away to leave. But before shutting the door, he stopped and without looking back, he spat, “You got what you want. I hope you’re satisfied.”

I badly wanted to scream in anger, but no words came out of my mouth. My entire body was trembling with too much resentment it was holding as if it would explode by any minute.

My head was filled with the most horrible words I could call him. Since Samuel didn’t mark me after all being mates, he cannot mind link me. I cursed him nonstop, hence none of it made me feel better.

I could accept not being his Luna as Lunas were supposed to have exceptional beauty and power which I clearly don’t have. And stupid it may appear, I can forgive him for that. But what he did tonight was unforgivable.

Living my entire life as torment, I couldn’t help but think that it would all just end if I was gone.

Sitting down on the mattress, my core began to ache as I felt his semen everywhere on my skin. I gathered myself up, grabbed the robe that was hanging beside my table, and walked out of my room.

I could feel pieces of leaves hitting my barefoot feet while the cold sharp stones pierce my toes. But I was too numb to even react.

Tears streamed down my cheeks while I continued to walk away from the Packhouse. A cold breeze blew before I heard a loud and long howl. I came to an abrupt stop, reaching the lake behind the Packhouse.

Fighting against my own misery was perhaps the most absurd thing I could have ever done. If I had given up earlier, I wouldn’t have ended up like this.

I looked down to peek through the lake in front of me, more tears fell down.

Ending my own misery would be the solution to all of my pain.

Without thinking twice, I took a deep breath, closing both my eyes as I pushed my shaky feet to step forward until my sole didn’t feel anything solid to keep me on the ground.

I knew I wasn’t sure about all of this, but it was also too late to back out. My skin felt the coldness of the water as I let my body slowly sink into the deepest of the water. It was the best decision I’ve been proud of. 

Chapter 2: Saviour to Torturer

Clara

I did it myself. The scar on my face that had brought me misfortunes was my own doing. Hence I actually couldn’t even blame myself for it. Because as far as I knew, having a perfectly beautiful face was never a blessing as well.

Given that I was our Pack’s Beta’s daughter, that didn’t save me from being maltreated as a teenager mainly because of my awful scar. But as I grew up, finding out I was wolfless made the bullying worse.

Hence, my mate, Samuel was once my saviour.

At the age of sixteen, after realizing I’m wolfless with almost every Pack member knowing about it, everyone almost sees me as a threat. Some even believed I was some curse they needed to crush before I brought misfortune to them.

The first time I came across Samuel that day in our region’s werewolf academy was still imprinted onto my mind very vividly.

Being seen as a misfortune bringer, I’m always all by myself with no friends at all. And although I was getting used to being bullied every single day, that day was kind of different.

Three of my male classmates waited just outside the academy’s gate. As soon as they saw me making my way out, a wicked smirk appeared on their faces.

Acting as if I didn’t see them a meter away, I kept on walking as my heart raced in nervousness. I kept on walking, hoping I’d make it past them, but I didn’t.

One of them went behind me while the remaining two were encircling around me.

I bowed my head down to hide my scar, waiting for their next move. Before I knew it, my backpack was already taken by one of them behind me.

He lifted his arm, holding my bag as he waggled it in the air.

“Please, give it back,” I was trying to sound as kind as possible, afraid that their anger might rise.

My face remained straight watching my bag reach about two meters away from our place as the boy threw it.

Just to avoid the conflict getting bigger, I was ready to run and get it from there. But one of them managed to rush before me because of his speed as a werewolf.

“Please, just give it back. I-I don’t want to cause any more trouble.”

“You want it? Get it! Here,” he laughs, extending his arm to hand me my bag.

I tiptoed, reaching my arm to reach it when he suddenly pulled it back making me stumble into the mud right in front of me.

My face was soaked with it making every student around us end up in laughter.

I could feel my chest getting heavier along with my eyes which just started producing hot tears. Biting my lower lip, I pulled myself up, sitting down on the grasses, wiping hints of mud into my eyes.

Opening them afterward, I didn’t expect whom I saw standing in front of me.

Samuel, the Alpha’s youngest son.

The laughter filling my ears went shut in a snap.

“Shh, he’s the Alpha’s son. We should pay our respect,” I even heard one of them murmuring.

And I was completely taken aback when he slightly bent down, offering his hand to me which I then took. I stood behind him, trying to clean up my face while he faced the bullies.

Without any hint of hesitation, Samuel took a step forward and threw his clenched fist onto one of the bullies' faces. Everyone, including me, was surprised.

I almost laughed out loud seeing his eyes balling out because of his bleeding nose. “Oh, God! I’m bleeding.”

“Give me her bag or I’ll make your eyes bleed this time,” Samuel firmly demanded, opening his hand to get my bag.

As if he was in a rush, he quickly handed him my bag as he wiped blood away from his face.

“All of you, apologize to her.”

One of them scoffed, “No! That won’t happen.”

Slowly nodding, Samuel stepped even closer to that guy, towering over his small body build. He proudly looked up at him as if he were challenging Samuel to fight with him. As soon as a low growl came out of Samuel’s lips, he backed down.

“Just apologize, Marco, so we can leave!” The guy Samuel punched annoyingly scolding his friend.

“We’re sorry, Clara. This won’t happen again,” he began.

“Ye-yeah, we’re sorry.”

“I’m sorry, Clara,” they all apologize before fleeing.

My eyes were focused on his well-built muscles and broad shoulders that made him appear more manly. He turned back to me and handed me my bag.

“T-thank you,” I timidly stutter, almost above a whisper.

Just after my bag reached my palm, he took out a handkerchief from his side pocket. He wiped my dirty face with mud, making me internally go crazy.

I stood there, watching his face which was only a few inches away from mine while he gently caressed my face with the cloth.

“There. Much better,” he remarked while I could almost feel my heart popping out seeing his wide and genuine smile.

“Samuel!” a woman’s high-pitched voice calls his name, making him immediately pull himself back up.

The handkerchief he was holding fell onto the ground whilst his eyes searched for the woman.

Her long wavy hair moves along with her swift steps as she reaches for Samuel with a bright smile. She was undeniably pretty, skin as white and as silky as milk. Obviously, her skin was flawless and the bright sun illuminated at her.

As if the envy building up inside me wasn’t enough, jealousy sank in as she wrapped her arms around Samuel’s biceps. I watched her give him a soft quick peck on his cheek while looking like a dirty rug in front of someone elite like them.

I gulped, wishing the soil would open up and consume me alive just for me to completely vanish when Samuel grabbed a couple of strands of her hair before kissing her back.

He glances at me once before he allows Alice to pull him with her. I forced a smile to show him, although my heart was tearing with jealousy.

From that very moment, I knew was nothing compared to his girlfriend. Maybe he helped me out of kindness, but I do take that on a different level because he was the first person to ever save me.

Hence, I began to accept the fact he won’t ever look at me the same way he did for Alice and I was halfway forgetting about his entire existence when my 18th birthday happened.

I saw him once again at the Packhouse, and at that time I felt everything was different. I thought I had made it clear to myself, but upon seeing him, the same feeling was present. It even intensified that I had to make sure I distance myself from him because it felt like I could lose control every single time we were close.

Although I was wolfless, I was still able to catch a hint of the scent of my mate. To my surprise, it was him.

I left the Packhouse with mixed emotions. At that moment, I didn’t even think about how is that possible to happen. But all I care about is if he can accept me. The only thing I am holding onto is our mate bond. 

Chapter 3: Foolish

Samuel

If I only knew attending my brother’s Pack’s event would bring me to my mate, I wouldn’t ever show up. But it was too important for my oldest brother, Arthur, that he needed us complete here.

As the Alpha of our region, he’s way responsible and has much responsibility in growing the Pack and this is one of them.

The event was yet to begin when my wolf started to act out of the blue. He was suddenly full of joy and excitement I knew we had never felt before, even with my girlfriend, Alice.

“Mate! Mate!” and when he began yelling those words, I groaned in annoyance.

I had already wished not to meet her for my whole life to the Moon Goddess, but it looked like my prayers were in vain.

“No, we’re not going to look for her,” I firmly talked to my wolf, sipping a glass full of champagne.

“But that’s our mate!”

My jaw tightens, placing the glass down to the table.

“We already have Alice,” I kept my words short as I knew my wolf had already had the knowledge that I was going to marry and make Alice my Luna no matter what happened. Even if I came to meet my own mate.

I promised her the throne as my Luna, and I love her so much to even disappoint her by any chance.

“No, Samuel. I just wanted to see our mate. Just let me see her at least.”

“No.” Seeing her would only cause my wolf to lose control and in the worst case, he might even take over me to shapeshift.

“I just want to see her and nothing more. I promise.”

I let out a deep breath, standing up from my seat. “Fine. But that’s just it. After seeing her, we’re off.”

“Yes! Go that way,” he instructed me to lead where the scent was coming.

Since almost four different packs were gathered for this event tonight, the hall was extremely crowded. I had to clear up my way just to make sure she wouldn’t get away from my sight.

“Quick! You will lose her!”

My steps were quick, extending my legs just to keep up with her pace. She was wearing a normal silver dress, facing the scene of the balcony in front of her as she roamed her eyes left to right as if she were looking for someone.

Her feet turn around, causing me to panic. In a swift motion, I leaped the distance to the nearest post, hiding myself.

“That’s it. You saw her.”

My wolf didn’t say anything in response but just small and low whimpers. Because of that, I decided to stay a little bit longer, hiding on the post while we watched her from afar.

I got a quick glance at her face. My brows shot up as I squinted my eyes to have a better look at her face, but the only thing I noticed was the scar on her left cheek.

It wasn’t that big, but it looked truly awful. She must have a terrible life to have that kind of scar on her face. Moreover, her fated mate already had someone else.

What an unfortunate life she has.

Shifting my head, I pinned to my mind that I shouldn’t care about her at all. If she would come to me and force us to be mates, then I would have no other choice but to reject her and break our mate bond.

I don’t want to be selfish, so in that way, she can have the chance to look for her chosen mate and love another man as well.

“Don’t do that, Samuel,” my wolf warned.

“We already have Alice!”

“But she’s not our mate! She is!”

While having those thoughts inside my head, I didn’t notice that her eyes were already staring right into mine. I hastily lean back to hide.

“I don’t care. I love Alice more than I could ever love our true mate.”

I could feel my wolf getting provoked with my answers, but that’s the truth. I shouldn’t have listened to him in the first place. Seeing our mate is driving him crazy and we might end up fighting if I don’t leave right now.

Making up my mind to leave with or without my wolf’s approval, I took a step out of the post I was hiding at. However, when I saw a familiar man making his way to our mate, through my peripheral vision, I immediately looked back.

Gerry, Arthur’s Beta, was talking to her. Seeing him widely smiling and talking to my mate made my blood boil in anger. Not in jealousy, but with pure wrath.

He could still smile so brightly while I lost mine after he killed my mother right in front of me. I have every bit of right to make him pay for what he had done, but my brother chose to make that murderer his Beta.

“I’m good, father. You don’t need to worry about me.”

I scoff, hearing her calling Gerry his father. A wicked smile formed on my face, slowly nodding as I glared at them. I had no idea he even had a daughter who unluckily ended up as my mate.

Then, if I couldn’t directly get my revenge on Gerry, I’d use his loved one just like what he did. As they say, an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth. He wouldn’t even foresee this coming.

“Don’t you dare think of using mate for your revenge!”

Moreover, having her in my hands would also mean strength and power.

I kept my straight face, shaking my head. “I’m afraid it’s too late for you to stop me.”

“Don’t hurt her, Samuel. She doesn’t have a wolf.”

Well, everything was going my way. Being wolfless, only makes my plan perfect. I can torture her all I want while being strong and powerful.

I waited until Gerry left and she was left alone again. I revealed myself and just what I thought, she already knew we were mates so fooling her wasn’t that hard.

“No, Samuel!” my wolf insisted. But I have already made up my mind.

She’s the only thing I can use for revenge and I wouldn’t let her slip away from my grip. It’s like having the most powerful card to twist Gerry’s world upside down.

With just a few lies and promises, I was able to convince her to come to my Pack and promise her a marriage that I knew wouldn’t happen.

“You’re so precious and I couldn’t wait till you're officially mine, my mate.”

I pushed forward to give her a kiss in order to make all of this believable, but seeing her scar this close, my flesh couldn’t take it.

“Why don’t we wait till the wedding?” I chuckle, pulling her closer to me.

Her eyes were twinkling with glee as she gracefully nodded before tiptoeing to wrap her arms around my neck.

“Yes, Samuel. Yes, I’ll marry you,” she giggled with her embrace going tighter. 

Chapter 4: Good-for-nothing

Clara

Glee and excitement weren’t the exact words I could describe at how fantastic I was feeling. Being accepted as his mate has been my only prayer to the Moon Goddess, and now that it is happening, it still feels so surreal.

I am yet to process Samuel’s acceptance of me as his mate, but I trust him too much for me to agree to be married to him. After all, this is where all of this would be heading.

After packing up a few things, I headed out of my room. My father was talking to Samuel, seated on the chairs on our dining table.

Being married to Samuel as an Alpha also means responsibilities for me as his Luna, however, I didn’t even think of any of that by any chance.

With or without his title as an Alpha, I will always choose to be with him.

I stood, not far away from them, with a smile, hearing Samuel assure my father of his love and my safety.

“I can’t believe everything happened so quickly,” my father chuckled, caressing my left shoulder. “If you ever came up with a problem there, you could go back home anytime,” he added, before pulling me for a warm hug.

My father was the only person I’ve got my whole eighteen years of life. I’m sure it will be hard for me without him.

“I will pay you a visit, Father,” I mumbled, embracing him back.

Since our Pack was led by Samuel’s older brother, it wasn’t a long time before we reached Samuel’s Pack; the White Hunter Pack.

My steps were continuous as I tried to keep up with his pace, walking behind him. I smiled at everyone we walked past while he kept his straight face. Upon reaching the wooden double doors of the Packhouse, I was confused to see a sudden bright smile flash on his face.

Not far away, I saw a woman in a long navy blue dress with jet-straight black hair hanging onto her shoulders.

Before I realized who the woman was, Samuel made his way straight to her arms.

“You’re back early,” she mumbled in between their peck kisses.

Wrapping her arms around Samuel’s neck brought me back to the day he saved me. The same feeling was there, hence way worse.

A huge lump in my throat began to build as I felt my eyes getting heavy with tears. The grip on the bag I was holding, where the stuff I brought was put, loosened. It slipped out of my hand, making a thud noise as it hit the ground.

Alice’s eyes averted to my place. Her brows furrowed, puzzled, with my presence.

“Who is she? My new servant?”

Caressing her cheeks, he said, “I’ll explain it to you later. But don’t worry about her, she’s nothing.”

No! I badly wanted to tell her the truth that I am Samuel’s mate, but no words came out of my mouth. Seeing how gentle he was towards her, made me scared.

Scared that I might consume his patience to the end and that he’d have a reason to be mad at me.

I thought that was the worst feeling I could ever have, but it is yet to come.

The wedding happened. I have my servant and my own huge room only to spend my time alone. A typical life of a Luna without her Alpha and respect from every Pack member. It felt like I was nothing here.

“What does this mean, Samuel?” I voiced out in frustration.

I’ve kept my silence for a while, thinking he’d eventually break up with Alice before our wedding. But it was done, and yet his mistress is still under this Packhouse, staying in the same room as my mate while I isolate myself in mine!

“You told me you love me. And even married me,” I paused as my voice began to tremble.

There was so much grudge I was holding back. Our wedding felt like some arranged marriage where no love was built. He didn’t even kiss nor touch me on our first day as husband and wife.

I was starting to question myself, but I knew I wouldn’t get an answer unless I asked Samuel straight.

“But we don’t even talk,” I added, barely hearing my own voice.

“What do you even want? You have our room, servant, and living a nice luxurious life because of me! Tell me, what else do you want?!”

“T-this ain’t the life I was expecting, Samuel,” I utter, shaking my head. “It is as if I am just being used.”

“I don’t have time for your dramas, Clara. Just leave the fuck out of my office, now!”

Here he is again. Avoiding me all the time. I just wanted to clarify things with him because it’s torturing me inside.

“And what is Alice still doing here? I am your mate and I should be in her place. I don’t understand a thing that’s happening.”

His eyes squinted in disbelief at my question.“Alright, then hear everything I would say, Clara,” he arrogantly scoffed. “Alice is my chosen mate and I will always choose her even against you, my own mate. Alice will be my and my Pack’s Luna.”

My chest felt so heavy with pain lancing everywhere. But it seems like he wasn’t satisfied yet just seeing me hurt.

“And you, let’s just say you were just my need and nothing else. Can’t you see, Clara?” he bitterly laughs. “I just need you to be stronger. So you should stop questioning me again and again because you should still be thankful instead.”

Beads of hot tears began to pour down my loaded eyes.

“No Alpha in the right mind will choose a wolfless and hideous Luna like you. You are privileged to be even called my first wife.”

I firmly bit my lower lip so hard that I could start to taste blood from it. I don’t want to say anything else anymore. Samuel had made it clearer than water.

He’s just using me. It has been and will always be Alice for him and never Clara.

“Leave!”

My both shoulders shook as he screamed right into my face. My knees were wobbly, disallowing me to move any further.

I kept my eyes on the floor as more tears pooled down. Even without a wolf, I am more than hurt to hear this indirect rejection from my mate.

Seeing me not moving a bit, Samuel carelessly grabbed my wrist, pushing the door of his office open before dragging me out.

“Samuel,” I helplessly called, hoping it would make his heart soft.

He pushed me out, making me reach the ground.

“Don’t you ever come and talk to me,” he spat, loudly banging on the door.

I tried lifting my head only to see a couple of Omegas chatting, giving me disdainful looks.

If Samuel, my mate himself doesn’t like me how much do his Pack members, right?

“How dare she even think of fighting against Luna Alice?”

“She’s nothing but a servant beside her,” their mocking laughs filled my ears.

“Too big-headed to even complain.”

Before I completely lost my mind with their hateful words, I forced myself to stand back up. Facing down to hide my face, I began to walk away.

“An Alpha like Alpha Samuel cannot deserve a Luna like Clara.”

I kept walking, acting as if I heard nothing. But the truth is, I heard every single word from them. It looks like they want me to hear every bit of it.

“It’s so considerate of Alpha Samuel to marry her in the first place. But this good-for-nothing trash wants more.” 

Chapter 5: Who’s Wicked?

Clara

“Luna, wake up!” Donna’s crying voice echoes through my ears continuously.

“How dare that ugly useless woman take her life inside the Packhouse?! If she wanted to die because she’s tired of living her awful life then she could have run to the woods and gotten herself eaten by rogues!”

“Can you please stop and just call for help? Call the Pack doctor.”

“Do you really think someone here would help this woman to live? She took her own life, so she wanted herself dead. Don’t waste your time and energy on this helpless woman, Donna,” the woman's voice Donna was arguing with bitterly chuckled.

“But she really doesn’t have any shame left, huh? She even did this here! Alpha Samuel and Luna Alice’s wedding will happen in just a day. Her death would cause their wedding trouble!”

“Luna Clara, please, don’t die,” Donna’s weep grew louder. “Please, wake up.”

With just one shake from her, my eyes automatically opened up wide. I caught my breath as I coughed, taking out water from my chest.

I wandered my eyes around, and thinking I had successfully died, I felt relieved. Even my death had to cause them trouble.

Instead of feeling sorry for me, all they could think of was how it could affect the wedding of their beloved Luna Alice.

“Luna! You’re alive!”

My eyes lit up not only with shock but disappointment upon realizing I was alive. I survived.

Donna immediately put her arms behind my neck and back as she helped me sit upright. She caressed my back before more water came out of my mouth.

Seeing that only Donna with one of the female butlers with me, another set of piercing pain crossed my heart.

I know I should have given up on Samuel a very long time ago, but here am I still hoping he’d be here at least for caring as someone fated to be his mate.

He wouldn’t even care any less if I died at the moment.

“Are you feeling okay, Luna?”

I simply nodded in response to lessen Donna’s worry about me. I consider myself lucky to have a servant like Donna who also stands as my friend in the Packhouse. Unlike everyone here, she sees me as a person worthy of respect.

She removed her robe and wrapped it around my wet clothes and body before helping me to get up.

“How come you didn’t just die,” the butler took out a deep breath, rolling her eyes at me.

Just like what I’ve always done, I ignored her. With Donna on my side, we both stepped to leave when the butler purposely pushed me. Before I lost my balance, Donna stepped up in front of me.

“You see. Luna Clara isn’t as weak as everyone here thinks. She’s stronger than you think!”

“I don’t give a fuck. You should make your useless awful Luna out of here because we have a wedding to arrange. The wedding of Alpha Samuel and Luna Alice that has been looked forward to by everyone,” she boastfully remarks, smirking at Donna.

She blew out a sigh before assisting me back inside the Packhouse. She pushed the main double doors and my lips parted in surprise upon seeing Alice standing not far away from it.

Her hands were crossed against her chest, looking straight at me.

Since the day I got here, she never talked or even came close to me. I don’t know the reason why, but perhaps she doesn’t want to make any connections with me. After all, his fiance was my mate.

Realizing she didn’t have any further plans to look away, I shifted my eyes away and took a step forward to walk past her. However, just when I was right beside her, I felt her soft hands reach for my wrist to forcibly tug me back.

“So, you want to die?”

I remained silent, watching her beautiful angelic face turn into a crumpled one.

“And kill yourself inside the Packhouse? For what? To get Samuel’s attention, gain his sympathy, and ask him to postpone our wedding?” Alice bitterly snickers.

“That’s not what I wanted—”

“Then what the hell do you want?!”

“You’ve got Samuel, Alice. He chose you over me and you are getting married to him very soon. I don’t understand why you’re being like this.”

Her jaw clenched, gritting her teeth in anger, which I had no idea where is coming from. Walking up to me, she grabbed my jaw.

“Because you are his first wife! I should be that, but you came along and ruined our wedding!”

“Luna Alice, please don’t hurt Luna Clara, she just got—” Donna was caught off guard when Alice shoved her aside.

I tried fleeing away from her grip, but she’s way stronger than I am.

“Being mated to Samuel was one thing. But you can’t use that against me,” she hissed, grasping the jaw to the point of pain.

“Our wedding will happen tomorrow and don’t you dare show yourself to ruin it! Do you understand?!”

Left with no other options, I nodded. She threw my face away, running her fingers through her long hair before walking away.

Why does she make it sound like I was at fault for being mated to Samuel? If I only knew I would end up with this kind of torn situation, I shouldn’t have prayed to Moon Goddess every single day to be Samuel’s mate.

“Come on, Luna. You need to rest,” Donna spoke behind me.

I sat by the mattress, deeply thinking about everything while Donna dried my hair.

Even I, myself couldn’t believe how far I endured everything here. I had every means to leave him and go back to our Pack, but I chose not to because I was hoping Samuel’s heart would change.

But, perhaps I had already tried changing someone not willing to. I wished for myself to unlove Samuel, and maybe the only thing that was holding me back was myself.

“Please don’t ever try to kill yourself again, Luna. Whatever you do, they will still see you as the one who’s at fault. So please don’t listen to them.”

Looking up at Donna, she forced a dejected smile.

She was right. I got tired of following everyone’s word, keeping my silence, hoping they’d come to accept me. Either way, follow them or not; I will always look the bad ones into their one-sided eyes.

“Donna, can you go out and get me these herbs and medicines?”

If I’m going to be an antagonist in their eyes, then why don’t I give them a good reason to treat and look at me that way?

And good for them, especially Samuel, that I know exactly where to start to get the respect I deserve as the Alpha’s mate and first wife.

I wouldn’t let them enjoy their awaited wedding that easily. 

Chapter 6: Healed

Clara

Donna’s forehead wrinkled. “Herbs and medicines, Luna? Why are you sick?”

“No, I’m fine. I just need them tonight so I can be ready for tomorrow.”

Hesitating, Donna still ended up just nodding. “Alright. Whatever you need, Luna.”

I opened up the little compartment on my drawer and began listing everything I’ll be needing in a piece of brown paper.

“You can get the help you will be needing.” I handed her the paper which Donna immediately examined. “I need those here as soon as possible, before tomorrow.”

Donna nodded, placing the paper onto her pocket. “But aren’t you going to rest, Luna? It’s been a long night for you.”

“No, I’m good.” I shook my head. “And I’m sorry for keeping you up this late.”

With an assuring smile, she shook her head before heading out, leaving me all alone inside my room.

The silence filling the atmosphere didn’t bring me peace of mind. And instead, doubt starts to crept inside me.

After knowing Samuel was my mate on my eighteenth birthday, I already had tried doing this same thing. To remove the scar I did. But I had failed tons of times, making me give up.

I came across Samuel and really thought I was accepted for what I have and who I am. But seeing my situation right now, I was wrong.

Regret was everything I could feel at that moment. Regret, but not because I shouldn’t have believed Samuel’s lies, but because I shouldn’t have done this scar to my face in the first place.

I may have trusted myself back then too much that I could for sure make that scar vanish whenever I wanted to. But I knew I wouldn’t have that much trust in myself, if I can’t do it. After all, I knew myself better than everybody else.

And today, I will make sure it will work and no other way around. There would be no room for self-doubt.

Discovering that I’m a good healer started after my teenage years. The first person I have proven my ability to was my father. Being a Beta, he always went to fight and hunt. And when father told everyone my ability, no one believed him or even wanted to be treated by me. My goal was to help, but they saw it as a threat.

Two hours had passed and still Donna hadn’t gone back. I kept peeking through the window, but all I could see was how everyone was busy, happily arranging the place for the celebration of Samuel’s second marriage with Alice.

Each minute that was passing by, made my anxiety grow bigger. I may run out of time if Donna doesn’t make it on time.

Dawn arrived and just when I was about to leave my room, the door pushed open. Donna went in, panting as she made sure to lock the door before heading to my place.

“Some guards out there didn’t want to let me in, Luna. They were questioning where am I going to use all of these,” she caught her breath, placing down a black cloth bag.

“What did you tell them?” My eyes were fixed on her sweaty face, worried what she said might alarm them.

“Don’t worry about it, Luna. I’m a good liar,” she chuckled, tapping my left shoulder.

Digging into the bag, I was glad to see everything I have listed was here. Looking up at the wall clock, I saw that I’ve only had almost six hours to make it before the wedding officially starts.

With adrenaline rushing through, I swept everything away from my table and began placing every herbs and medicine down. Seeing many of them overwhelmed me. It has been months since I have last done this.

I took a deep breath before starting to mix the ingredients onto the small porcelain bowl I was holding.

Beads of sweat fell down on my forehead, but I was too busy to even wipe them. My eyes were fixed onto the mixture I was trying to make when a sudden knock appeared by the door.

Donna, who was standing a meter away from me, was shocked. “I will attend to the door, Luna. You continue what you’re doing.”

Mix after mix, and all I could feel was nervousness. Grabbing the last herb that will make this mixture complete, I swallowed hard before tearing its leaves into pieces before mixing it.

At exact four in the morning, four hours before the wedding, I was done creating the mixture. Satisfaction and fear was consuming me.

I cleaned the surface of my scar first before dabbing the mixture onto my skin. I was too preoccupied that I didn’t notice Donna had gone back. She was carefully watching my every move with a hopeful look in her eyes.

“I see it now, Luna. The herbs and medicine was for your scar,” she mumbled.

“If fate was on my side this time, my scar would finally vanish, Donna.”

“I wished you all the best, Luna. It’ll work!”

This scar has been with me for years, yet the thirty minutes of waiting for the mixture to sink into my skin, felt like forever.

My hands were relentlessly shaking, grabbing a piece of clean cloth to wipe the mixture out of my face.

Too many what ifs were lingering in my mind.

What if it didn’t work? What if I’m going to have this scar for eternity? What if it turns out worse?

Hence, all of those questions instantly fade when another knock interrupts which Donna hastily attends to.

“What do you need?” Donna asked, keeping the door open narrow and small.

“Alpha Samuel sent me to guard Luna Clara’s room to make sure we won’t be able to leave until the wedding ceremony is finished,” a man’s voice responded.

“Is she inside?”

“Y-yes,” Donna stuttered.

“Move aside. I need to see her inside myself.”

With a quick glance, Donna instructed me to turn around and face my back onto the door. I immediately looked back, hiding my face from the guard.

“All right,” the guard uttered lastly, before moving back.

Shutting back the door, Donna faced me with a torn look on her face.

It seems like Samuel’s doing everything just not to see even my glimpse on his important day.

Well, it’s so unfortunate of him because if my scar was successfully removed, then my will to ruin his wedding day will be way stronger than my fear of disobeying him.

My hands that were shaky turned colder as I continued to wipe the remaining mixture. I was firmly biting my lower lip with my eyes locked at my reflection through the mirror.

The moment I took off everything that was covering my scar, I gasped a breath away upon seeing my face without it. This is for the longest time I’ve ever got a chance to catch a glance of myself without the burden that caused me hell.

Running my fingers onto my left cheek, the feeling was bizarre.

“It worked, for real,” I puffed, my eyes peeling open as I couldn’t get them off into my reflection through the mirror.

Pure joy and excitement were the only things I could feel. A strange feeling from what I have been having: regret and disgust.

“Oh, my! You are so beautiful, Luna! A real Goddess!” Donna beams excitedly.

A drop of tear fell down my left eye which was followed by an amused giggle.

My first step into my plan worked. So what else could stop me from doing the rest of my plan?

“Get me my dress, Donna. I will attend my mate’s wedding,” I announced, keeping my gaze on the mirror as if I were memorizing every inch of my features.

“You’re gonna get back what’s yours, Luna,” Donna remarked, nodding. “Alpha Samuel will definitely love you now that you’re even prettier than Luna Alice,” she added, grinning from ear to ear.